A Great Day

Yesterday the weather was the best it has been all year, 77 sunny and a nice breeze. The weather was so perfect it made my day. Nothing could’ve upset me yesterday. The weather was great so I was great!
I consciously decided to be happy and let nothing bother me because of the great weather. So I’m thinking today what if I had that attitude every day? How would my life be different? I think that my life would be more calm, that I would worry less and that overall my life would be less stressful.
Just a thought.

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Define Involvement

“You’re a handsome, hardworking Christian man with a laid back demeanor that seems to draw lovely ladies often. What keeps you from involving yourself with more than one at a time or simply none at all????”

I often respond to a question with a question before answering to clarify what I was asked, so I asked her to “Define involvement specifically?” She answered “Talking or physically interacting as more than just friends?”

I gave a short answer to her question which is the following. “To me it is not worth the effort that it would take to talk or anything else if it won’t lead to the two of us getting married and I don’t want to have to explain to my future wife who, what, where, when, how and why whatever happened, happened. Also there are a few other reasons too.

I later gave her the following semi-proper answer. “I’m paraphrasing but in Ecclesiastes 12 I remember it saying remember God in your youth, and in an earlier chapter it says that pleasure and possessions are futile. There are also several verses in Proverbs that tell us to avoid physical interactions outside of marriage.”

So, this is a more complete answer combining the two above. I don’t talk to or physically interact with the “lovely ladies” because I don’t draw the lovely ladies often. Often is an overstatement but that’s beside the point. To me the effort that it would take to “talk” someone that I don’t see myself marrying would be wasted, and it would be pointless for me to waste my time if I don’t see myself marrying her. I also think that it wouldn’t be fair or respectful to the young lady that I would be talking to if I were to lead her on and waste her time as well.

Now I wouldn’t involve myself with more than one lady at a time simply because that is my personality. My personality was shaped by my parents and I remember my dad telling me that when he was single that he didn’t want what wasn’t his, so I adopted that rule and I don’t want what isn’t mine. If I she isn’t my girlfriend, fiancé or wife I don’t want her.

Currently I am not “talking” to any because I have I haven’t met a girl that I can see myself marrying, also I don’t have much to give any girl that would date me right now. I’ll write more on why I don’t have a girlfriend in another blog. Also I don’t want anyone who doesn’t want me, so between my standards, the condition that she must also want me as I do her I don’t talk to the “lovely ladies.”

I do not have physical interactions more than a quick hug for several reasons. These are not in order of importance.

First, some interactions can lead to other interactions which can lead to sex and I’m waiting until I am married.

Second, avoiding these interactions keeps a lot of unnecessary drama away from me.

Third, knowing what my wife will have to be like to deal with me is kind of scary. I joke around and play around a lot, sarcasm is a specialty of mine so she’ll most likely be quick witted with a little bit of an attitude which can be good or bad. In the case it’d be pretty bad when I have to explain to all my previous interactions before her.

Forth, and I’ll leave it at this I’ve been told that I have to try out what I’m buying before I buy it, and that I wouldn’t buy a car without test driving it first. My response to that line of thinking is that I’m not buying just any car. The best cars you pay for before you ever even see them and you can’t test drive them until you pay for them. Personally I want a Ford Mustang GT500 Super Snake a car priced over $60,000. Anyone buying one of those has to pay for it before they can drive it. Also if to virgins marry it doesn’t matter how bad their sex is because it’ll be the best they ever had.

Just my thoughts…what do you think?

A Love Story

Once a woman was waiting for the man of her dreams. The man her father had told her about growing up. Many men had tried to convince her that they were the one she was looking for, but non of them were. One day a man came up to her and introduced himself as the man of her dreams. Skeptical she dismissed his comment. The next day he introduced himself again as the man she had been waiting for. She told him that he is not and walked away. Again the next day he approached her but before he could say anything she said “Please stop. You are not the man of my dreams. My father told me growing up about him and you aren’t him.” He replied ” But your father sent me. Don’t you recognize me?” She said “He would tell me if he did send you.” Respectfully he walked away without saying a word to her. Afterward she called her father out of frustration about the man. Her father listened and told her that he had a lunch meeting with a friend and that she should come so after lunch they could talk in more detail.
The next day she walked into the restaurant and saw her father waving at her. She walked to the table hugged her father standing to greet her and shook hands with his friend and introduced herself automatically. Immediately he took her hand and she heard a familiar voice say “Nice to meet you, again.” She looked at his face and smiling at her it was the man she had turned down the last three days.
To be continued.

My Type

One of my friends recently asked me if I have a type because “they are never your type” talking about when girls who are interested in me. This is how I define my type, my standards.

Number 1, I must be physically attracted to her. I know some people may have an issue with this but hear me out. I know lots of people with great personalities, great skills, absolutely hilarious and are just great people but if I am not physically attracted to them then that’s where any chance of being anything more than friends ends with me. For example ladies let’s say that there is a guy and he is tall dark and handsome, or he can sing, cook and is great with kids, or whatever floats your boat, but he looks like Shrek or Lord Farquaad. That is probably a deal breaker. The same goes for the fellas. If she look can cook, likes to clean, sing and her favor sports and hobbies are your favorite sports and hobbies, but she looks like Yzma, Cruella de Vil, or Ursula that’s probably a deal breaker.

Number 2, for me she must be saved. By that I mean a Christian and a real one. I know you might be thinking “Whoa! As a Christian shouldn’t Jesus be First.” Well when I’m walking around and see a young lady the first thing that goes through my mind is “Wow, she’s pretty.” Then “I wonder if she is saved?” If I see Yzma Ursula de Vil I’m not attracted so she is not my type since she doesn’t fulfill one of my top qualifications for being “My Type.”

Number 3, this one is just a personal preference than anything but for me she must be able to cook. By cook I mean burn, throw down, she’s like a borderline professional chef and loves to cook because I love to eat.

So those are my top three and these are pretty much non negotiable. Both numbers 1 and 2 must be met and I do not compromise on those ever. Even if she is crazy for me and is the most beautiful women walking on earth if she isn’t saved and for real it’s a deal breaker. Now honestly I’m not saying that it is easy for me to keep up theses standards. Trust me it is not easy most times, but it’ll be worth it when I meet my wife and she’s all I wanted and more.

Now number 3 I am a little more flexible with but still it is very important to me, so if she just flat out refuses, doesn’t know and has no will to learn to cook, or “hates cooking” that is an instant deal breaker for me. There is ZERO chance that we could work. As saved as she could be and she could be the most beautiful woman in the world, but I can’t eat her love for Jesus and good looks.

Other preferences I have in no particular order are as it follows. She has to be in shape or fit and either doesn’t mind working out or likes or even loves to workout. I am a fairly athletic person and my lifestyle reflects so I’d like woman with that same type of lifestyle and mentality.

I am an extremely sarcastic and sometimes witty person so someone with an equal sarcastic and witty personality would be nice or thick skin because sometimes I say things that can be taking the wrong way completely and I am completely oblivious to it.

My sense of humor is pretty simple so I’ll laugh at a good amount of things so there’s that to consider. Speaking of humor I am a big kid at heart. I’d rather go see the new kid’s movie that’s out than most other movies, (unless it’s a well made superhero/action movie). For example, Furious 7 (the seventh movie in the Fast and Furious series) is a new movie that I want to see, so I’d go see that and then I’d go see Home as well. I still want to see Big Hero 6.

I don’t drink but I don’t mind if people do drink. It is the getting drunk and completely wasted consistently that I have a problem. I am also not one for clubs. So these are things that factor into looking for my future wife and things she would need to know about me.

I do not dance now but I do want to learn how to dance like ballroom dancing, the salsa and the tango.

Another major point is of major importance to me if I am saving myself for her I think I deserve someone who is doing the same, also if she already has a child than that is a deal breaker at this point in my life.

If you still skeptical about my first two standards Dr. R.A. Vernon’s 10 Rules of Dating is a great book to read (or skim) and in the first two chapters he explains exactly what I mean in greater detail. I actually read it in about two days in between classes. It’s only 100 something pages so it is not that bad at all.

So yea this is probably the most detailed written account to date of “My Type.” What do you think about “My Type?” I’m looking forward to hearing from you.

Forgiving

Forgiving people isn’t easy we all know that, but forgiving is essential. Forgiving someone for what they did to you is for that person but also for you. I know this from experience.

Once someone who I trusted a lot and knew me well let me down big. The let down was unintentional I’m sure but never the less a letdown and a big one. Talking with my friend became hard because all I could think of was how they had messed up and unintentionally messed me up. I would catch myself thinking about how this could happen and why they’d let it happen and for a good while it consumed a lot of my time. While my friend was out living their life and enjoying it, I wasn’t. I was wasting my life because I couldn’t forgive them for a mistake they had made.

It took some time for me to sort through everything but eventually I came to terms with what happened and we are still good friends so do not worry all is good here.

Now, let’s flip the situation. I’ve had a friend come up to me before and told me that they use to hate me. Literally “I use to hate you because…” now I apologized immediately for what I did after I found out why they felt that way. Still though I was living my life enjoying every day of it my life was really going well, but they that person because they couldn’t forgive spent months, a little over a year actually, in a state of hate and taking away their own happiness because they couldn’t forgive.

Now I know forgiving isn’t easy but it is defiantly worth it and most times you can’t do it on your own so if you have to ask for help or just talk to someone, including myself, do it.

Maybe one day I’ll publish a more detailed and specific account of these two stories, who knows we’ll see.

Well I hope this was helpful to you. If it was or still is let me know I’d love to hear about it.

See Ya

Why I don’t have a Girlfriend

I get asked if I have a girlfriend pretty frequently but lately I’ve gotten asked that more than normal. I do not have a girlfriend right now. Sometimes the extra curious ask why I do not have a girlfriend. Those extra curious people are generally older women that I work with or people that I know well enough to give an extended response to. This is my typical extended answer.
I don’t have a girlfriend right now because right now there are three things that I can do for her and two of them aren’t good. I can make her mad, make her happy or get her pregnant. That’s all I can do for her right now. So to me I need to be able to do more than make her happy, mad or pregnant.
Also, I’m dating to marry not just to date. So, for me to date a young lady I have to think that she is marriage material. Someone I can see myself spending the rest of my life with. I guess I’d say that marriage material is my “type” of lady.
Every time I give that answer everyone that hears it tells me that it is a great answer and they understand completely. Occasionally they try to put throw in a future hook up with a family member.
There is more to come on what “My Type” is, so stay tuned.

Who Am I?

Who am I? I am a 23 year old college student and I am here to share my uncommon thoughts about pretty much anything that I think about be it funny, serious, dumb, sad, thought provoking, sports or food. Also I’ll probably be asking you for some advice. My name is Joshua, also known as Josh, a number of variations of Josh and a few other nicknames.

I am blogging publicly for two main reasons one is to see what happens (curiosity) and the second is because I’ve been told that I’d be a good mentor and example and figured this could be a way of helping people with my unique and uncommon perspective on life. So I’ll be writing about whatever comes to mind, questions I have been asked by friends and family, questions that I get asked a lot by others, and eventually questions from you.

So I’d like to welcome you into my mind and hopefully you’ll enjoy My Uncommon Thoughts.